Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

We waited 19 years for this movie, was it worth the wait?

Nope.

It was better than Temple of Doom. Do I really need to expand on that?

There wasn't any real action until 15 minutes in. The violence was very subdued compared to the three previous films. I never really got the sense that they knew what they wanted to do with that movie. I can just see them writing the script:

"Let's try this!"
"Ok, let's go there. Then we could throw in this bit of childish humor, we want to appeal to kids."
"Oh yeah, kids will love that. All kids love slapstick."
"Well what about the plot?"
"Yeah, do we really need one? It's Indiana Jones, people will go to see it regardless."

And we did! There were parts of the movie that worked, but it was disconnected for the most part. I think Spielberg has gotten too artsy to do a movie like Indiana Jones. I know Minority Report was a sci-fi/action movie, but that's different. It was a much better film than any of the Indiana Jones movies. Stop, I don't want to hear it. Raiders was awesome but Minority Report is better.

Spielberg's too detached from the action/adventure genre. It just felt forced. Each one of his jokes felt forced and stupid. There weren't any truly funny moments like when he shoots the swordsman in the market in Raiders. None of that.

Cate Blanchett was just weird as the villain. Her accent went in and out throughout the film. You never really got the sense that she was going to be much of a threat. She wasn't as despicable as Belloq or Donovan in Crusade.

It felt like an A-Team movie.

Perhaps he needs to put down the bottle during the playoffs

How many times is Soda Popinski going to have to learn the same lesson? The year they won the Super Bowl they played everybody in every game. You can't let up at the end of the season. Look at this previous season; the two teams that made it to the Super Bowl played every starter in all 16 games. That's how you make it to the Super Bowl.

I hate it when teams sit their starters the last 1 or 2 games of the season. What good does that serve? All you're doing is getting your players out of the habit of playing. You need to go into the playoffs firing on all cylinders. That way when you run up against a group of punks, like the Chargers, you won't fall flat.

Hopefully we've learned this lesson for the last time.

A sign of things to come?

Here we have a picture of John McCain before taking office. And a picture of John McCain after taking office. Things aren't looking up for the country right now. You have two psychos on the left who want to give us socialized health care, open boarders, taxes on "man made" global warming, and they're vowing to end the war in Iraq within a year!

On the right you have a man that wants to privatize health care (good!), tax us on "man made" global warming, open the boarders, but fight the war out to victory. I guess two out of four isn't bad, but the man won't attack anybody on the left. Instead he chastises people on the right for telling it like it is. Every time he gives a speech it induces sleep. How many times is he going to vow to catch Bin Laden?

Whenever he mentions "man made" global warming I want to scream my head off. How can you vote for a man who has bought into the biggest hoax ever perpetuated by humans? How intelligent can he be?

If we vote for McCain we're going to be slightly less screwed than we would be with Barry Hussein Obama or Hillary.

I'm still on the fence.

Get that guy some turducken!

I was playing Mario Kart Wii last night when I noticed something; Bowser is fairly reminiscent of John Madden. They both have broad shoulders, big eye brows, big mouths, and big appetites.

Will John Madden be able to exist without Brett Favre in Green Bay? Will NBC have the guts to have a Sunday night game in Green Bay? You know that they'll do some retrospective of Favre's career. It will have some lame music and try to be all dramatic. They're going to try to sell you on the fact that he's the "greatest" quarterback of all time.

Look, he was a great QB, but nowhere near the best. Montana, Johnny U, Elway, Marino, Manning, Moon, Fouts, Stabler, Tarkantan, Ryan Leaf, etc. are all better than Favre. None of those QBs have thrown as many moronic passes as Favre. But I guess they're just not as exciting as he is. Somehow Brett Favre is viewed as being more exciting than John Elway. Right.

The real atrocity is going to be ESPNBAs coverage of a Green Bay game. Can't wait to hear Tony Kornheiser wax poetic about Favre. I'll save my hatred for Kornheiser for another post.

Eric Roberts Set to Resume Coaching Duties in Colorado

Here's a question; why are the Avalanche making Granato the coach again? It was mediocre the first time around. Why will this be different? Not only that, did anybody notice that the team lacked fire when he coached?

Why didn't they pursue Paul Maurice? A man that has been to the finals and knows what it takes. Why not go after Bowman? I know he's done coaching, but at least throw something at him.

Wait! What about Ron Wilson? Nobody is going to make the Sharks better than he did. That team just lacks heart.

We're in for a tough one in Colorado. Buckle up and get ready for a bumpy ride, again.

If you do play golf America

Ok, so maybe it's ok for people to play golf if they truly want to play and become good at it.

So here's what you would be golfers should do. Go buy Ben Hogan's book, Ben Hogan's Five Lessons: The Modern Fundamentals of Golf, and work with that. That is the best instructional book you can buy on golf. He has a way of putting things so that you can understand them. Plus he's the best ball striker of all time. But he's a very humble guy and it shows in the book.

Like Chad said, don't hit the course until you're ready. You have to practice before you can play. This is the one sport where you cannot go out and play without practice. You will suffer.

Separated at Birth?

You tell me, is this the same person? One of these gentlemen is a hockey player, the other is a goon. Which is which?

Prediction

I'm not going out on a limb with this one, but I just want to be the first person to say "I told you so."

The Broncos are going 6-10 this season, if they're lucky.

With any luck, they'll fire Shanahan, hire Marty Schottenheimer (or Bill Cowher), go 11-5 in the 2009-2010 season, and win the Super Bowl. That part is a bit far-fetched, but I think we could have the perfect storm to fire Shanahan. We'll see.

Don't play golf America.

Don't Play Golf America

Seriously, what is up with all the people on the golf courses? You get these yahoos out there that have no chance of breaking 100 and they claim to be having fun. So one idiot's joy is another person's misery I guess. That would be the poor soul stuck behind that duffer.

Why do crappy golfers insist on playing slowly? There's no possible way they're ever going to shoot a good score. Why not keep moving? Why spend minutes at a time trying to fish golf balls out of the water with your ball shagger?

I know that my brother, my dad, and I aren't the only golfers who are annoyed by this. There has got to be an enclave of above-average golfers out there pissed at the same thing we're pissed at. I think the PGA Tour's ad campaign promoting golf should be stopped. All they're doing is making our rounds of golf longer. If golf were meant to be played by the masses, it would be. But it's not a game like soccer that you can just pick up and play.

So, save yourself the pain and the anguish people. Don't buy that first set of clubs unless you intend to become better! If you're just doing it because it's popular, stay the hell away. We don't need you slowing up our rounds.

Golf should not be an excuse to get out and drink beers. That's why they invented Nascar. Go play horseshoes and down a sixer.

Don't play golf America.